As You Like It

Act 5, Scene 3

Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY.

TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY enter.

TOUCHSTONE

Tomorrow is the joyful day, Audrey. Tomorrow will we be married.

TOUCHSTONE

Tomorrow is the happy day, Audrey. We’ll be married tomorrow.

AUDREY

I do desire it with all my heart, and I hope it is no dishonest desire to desire to be a woman of the world.

AUDREY

I can’t wait. I hope it doesn’t make me unchaste that I really want to be a married woman.

Enter two PAGES

Two PAGES enter.

Here comes two of the banished duke’s pages.

Here come two of Duke Senior’s pages.

FIRST PAGE

Well met, honest gentleman.

FIRST PAGE

Good afternoon, good gentleman.

TOUCHSTONE

By my troth, well met. Come, sit, sit, and a song.

TOUCHSTONE

It really is good to see you. Come, sit, sit, and sing me a song.

SECOND PAGE

We are for you. Sit i’ th’ middle.

SECOND PAGE

Sounds good to us. Sit between us.

FIRST PAGE

Shall we clap into ’t roundly, without hawking or spitting or saying we are hoarse, which are the only prologues to a bad voice?

FIRST PAGE

Should we just get down to it? Should we skip all that hacking and spitting and saying that we’re hoarse, which only makes clear what lousy singers we are?

SECOND PAGE

I’ faith, i’ faith, and both in a tune like two gypsies on a horse.

SECOND PAGE

Yes, yes, and let’s sing in unison, like two gypsies riding on a single horse.

PAGES

(sing)

It was a lover and his lass,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey-nonny-no,

That o’er the green cornfield did pass

In springtime, the only pretty ring time,

When birds do sing, Hey ding a ding, ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

Between the acres of the rye,

PAGES

(singing)

There was a lover and his girl,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey-nonny-no,

Who walked through the cornfield

In the springtime, the only proper wedding time,

The time when birds sing, Hey ding-a-ding-ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

Between the acres of rye,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey-nonny-no,

These pretty country folks would lie

In springtime, the only pretty ring time,

When birds do sing, Hey ding a ding, ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

This carol they began that hour,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey hey-nonny-no,

How that a life was but a flower

In springtime, the only pretty ring time,

When birds do sing, Hey ding a ding, ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

And therefore take the present time,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey hey-nonny-no,

For love is crownèd with the prime

In springtime, the only pretty ring time,

When birds do sing, Hey ding a ding, ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey-nonny-no

The pretty country folk would lie

In the springtime, the only proper wedding-time,

The time when birds sing, Hey ding-a-ding-ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

They wrote this song at that time,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey-nonny-no,

About how life was as short-lived as a flower

In the springtime, the only proper wedding time,

The time when birds sing, hey ding-a-ding-ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

So seize the present time,

With a hey, and a ho, and a hey-nonny-no,

For love is all perfection

In the springtime, the only proper wedding time,

The time when birds sing, Hey ding-a-ding-ding.

Sweet lovers love the spring.

TOUCHSTONE

Truly, young gentlemen, though there was no great matter in the ditty, yet the note was very untunable.

TOUCHSTONE

Really, young men, though it wasn’t a very hard song to get right, the music was still all out of tune.

FIRST PAGE

You are deceived, sir. We kept time. We lost not our time.

FIRST PAGE

No, sir, you’re wrong; we kept the song’s time, we didn’t lose any.

TOUCHSTONE

By my troth, yes. I count it but time lost to hear such a foolish song. God be wi’ you, and God mend your voices.— Come, Audrey.

TOUCHSTONE

Oh, yes you did—I lost time listening to your foolish song. God be with you, and I hope He fixes your voices! Come on, Audrey.

Exeunt

They all exit.