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The Comedy of Errors

Act 4, Scene 2

Enter ADRIANA and LUCIANA	ADRIANA and LUCIANA enter.
ADRIANA Ah, Luciana, did he tempt thee so? Mightst thou perceive austerely in his eye That he did plead in earnest, yea or no? Looked he or red or pale, or sad or merrily? What observation mad’st thou in this case Of his heart’s meteors tilting in his face?	ADRIANA Oh, Luciana, did he tempt you like that? Could you tell from his face if he was serious? Yes or no? Did he look flushed or pale? Sad or happy? Could you tell from his looks what he was feeling in his heart?
LUCIANA First he denied you had in him no right.	LUCIANA First, he said you had no right to him.
ADRIANA He meant he did me none; the more my spite.	ADRIANA He meant he did nothing right for me—which is true, unfortunately.
LUCIANA Then swore he that he was a stranger here.	LUCIANA Then he swore he was a stranger here.
ADRIANA And true he swore, though yet forsworn he were.	ADRIANA And that’s true—he is being strange. And yet he lies as well, for he’s no stranger.
LUCIANA Then pleaded I for you.	LUCIANA Then I pleaded for you.
ADRIANA And what said he?	ADRIANA And what did he say?
LUCIANA That love i begged for you he begged of me.	LUCIANA That he felt for me the love that I begged him to feel for you.
ADRIANA With what persuasion did he tempt thy love?	ADRIANA How did he try to persuade you to love him?
LUCIANA With words that in an honest suit might move. First he did praise my beauty, then my speech.	LUCIANA With words that—if they were spoken honestly—might have moved me. First, he praised my beauty, then my eloquence.
ADRIANA Did’st speak him fair?	ADRIANA Did you praise him as well?
LUCIANA Have patience, I beseech.	LUCIANA Have some patience, please.
ADRIANA I cannot, nor I will not hold me still; My tongue, though not my heart, shall have his will. He is deformèd, crooked, old, and sere, Ill-faced, worse-bodied, shapeless everywhere, Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind, Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.	ADRIANA I cannot and I will not keep quiet. My voice will have its way, even if my heart can’t. He is misshapen, crooked, old, and withered. His face is ugly, and his body is even worse—all shapeless, everywhere. He is vicious, mean, foolish, blunt, unkind. His body is deformed, and his mind is worse.
LUCIANA Who would be jealous, then, of such a one? No evil lost is wailed when it is gone.	LUCIANA Then why be jealous of a person like that? When an evil thing has been lost, no one cries.
ADRIANA Ah, but I think him better than I say, And yet would herein others’ eyes were worse. Far from her nest the lapwing cries away. My heart prays for him, though my tongue do curse.	ADRIANA Oh, but I think of him more highly than I say I do—and I wish he looked worse in other women’s eyes. I’m like a lapwing, creating a diversion in order to distract predators from my nest. My heart adores him, even though my tongue curses him.
Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE, running	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE enters, running.
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Here, go—the desk, the purse! Sweet, now make haste.	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Here! Go! The desk! Money! Come on, now! Hurry!
LUCIANA How hast thou lost thy breath?	LUCIANA How did you lose your breath?
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE By running fast.	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE By running fast.
ADRIANA Where is thy master, Dromio? Is he well?	ADRIANA Where’s your master, Dromio? Is he all right?
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE No, he’s in Tartar limbo, worse than hell. A devil in an everlasting garment hath him, One whose hard heart is buttoned up with steel; A fiend, a fury, pitiless and rough; A wolf, nay, worse, a fellow all in buff; A back-friend, a shoulder clapper, one that countermands The passages of alleys, creeks, and narrow lands; A hound that runs counter and yet draws dryfoot well, One that before the judgment carries poor souls to hell.	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE No, he’s in a place worse than hell. A devil in a tough uniform has him—a man whose heart is as hard as steel. A fiend and a goblin, pitiless and rough. A wolf—no, even worse—a man all in tough leather. A backbiting friend, one who grabs people, who patrols the streets and passageways. A hunting dog that runs in the opposite direction of its prey, yet can follow the scent of the hunt. A man who puts people away before the verdict is announced.
ADRIANA Why, man, what is the matter?	ADRIANA Speak, man, what’s the matter?
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE I do not know the matter. He is ’rested on the case.	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE I don’t know what the matter is, but he’s been arrested for it.
ADRIANA What, is he arrested? Tell me at whose suit.	ADRIANA What? He’s been arrested? Tell me, who had him arrested?
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE I know not at whose suit he is arrested well, But he’s in a suit of buff which ’rested him; that can I tell. Will you send him, mistress, redemption—the money in his desk?	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE I don’t know who had him arrested, but the man that arrested him was in a suit of leather. Mistress, will you send him bail? The money in the desk?
ADRIANA Go fetch it, sister.	ADRIANA Get it, sister.
Exit LUCIANA	LUCIANA exits.
This I wonder at, That he, unknown to me, should be in debt. Tell me, was he arrested on a band?	I don’t understand it. How could he be in debt without me knowing it? Tell me, was he arrested because of a band ?
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Not on a band, but on a stronger thing: A chain, a chain. Do you not hear it ring?	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Not for a band, but for something stronger: a necklace, a necklace! Don’t you hear it ring?
ADRIANA What, the chain?	ADRIANA What, the necklace?
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE No, no, the bell. ’Tis time that I were gone. It was two ere I left him, and now the clock strikes one.	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE No, no, the bell. It’s time for me to go. It was two o’clock when I left him, and now it’s one.
ADRIANA The hours come back. That did I never hear.	ADRIANA Time’s running backward? I’ve never heard of that.
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE O yes, if any hour meet a sergeant, he turns back for very fear.	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Oh, sure. When an hour meets a cop, it turns and runs in fear.
ADRIANA As if time were in debt. How fondly dost thou reason!	ADRIANA Time’s not the one in debt. Your logic is so foolish.
DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Time is a very bankrout and owes more than he’s worth to season. Nay, he’s a thief too. Have you not heard men say That time comes stealing on by night and day? If he be in debt and theft, and a sergeant in the way, Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day?	DROMIO OF SYRACUSE Time is always bankrupt: it owes more than it can ever pay back in a season. And Time’s a thief, too—don’t you know the old saying, “Time steals along”? So if Time is in debt and also a thief, and a cop comes, don’t you think Time would turn back an hour?
Re-enter LUCIANA with a purse	LUCIANA returns with a purse full of money.
ADRIANA Go, Dromio. There’s the money. Bear it straight, And bring thy master home immediately. Come, sister, I am pressed down with conceit: Conceit, my comfort and my injury.	ADRIANA Here’s the money, Dromio. Take it to your master and bring him home immediately. Come, sister, my imagination is too much for me: it both comforts me and depresses me.
Exeunt	They exit.